Before Mortal Kombat, before all the other twitch games, there was Defender, an ’80s arcade which had an unbelievable-for-the-time five buttons to control the ships weaponry. Defender is a classic—the classic—side-scrolling spaceship shooter. Your fighter zooms along, blasting the evil mutants trying to kidnap the helpless humanoids. Your job? Blast ‘em.

Retro games can be a lot of fun. They are a blast from the past for players old enough to remember when they were new, and they can be a new insight into gaming for younger players. Setting up and maintaining older systems is a lot less fun. If you are determined never to blow on another cartridge again, these titles can help.

I sometimes worry I’m too easy of a reviewer; that I dish out fours and fives by default, remember only the good parts of games, glossing over the rough edges, and just generally giving designers the benefit of the doubt. Then I run into games like Pitz and Pang, now out for the iPhone and iPod touch. It’s not that they’re bad games, it’s just that the controls are so wonky—for both of them— that I feel like I’m fighting with the interface rather than the game itself.