Finally, self-serve beer machines have arrived

Sections: Gadgets / Other, Lifestyle

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I don’t know about you, but when I’m checking out at a grocery store using a self-serve machine, all I’m really thinking is, “Why can’t I do this with beer?!” Or I’m thinking “Are these Fuji apples or Granny Smith?! I don’t want to lie!” My life is hard. Well it turns out my dream of one day being able to serve myself a cold beer at sporting events is becoming a reality. Maybe it’s just me, but having to simultaneously order my pretzel and beer at the same time to avoid waiting in multiple lines is really cutting down on my game-watching time. And by that I mean my multiple attempts to get on the jumbotron. I’ll dance all night if I have to, Phillies!

Minnesota Twins’ Target Field has taken the lead on a bubbly project: self-serve beer machines. REJOICE! Target Field has four beers ready for self-serve: Bud, Bud Light, Shock Top Lemon Shandy or Goose Island 312 Urban Pale Ale. Hot damn! And you can pour 48 ounces every 15 minutes.

Here’s the best part: you buy a pre-paid beer card to use the machine. And here I thought subway cards were cool, but they’ve got nothing on BEER CARDS. You know you’ve made it when you’ve got one of those in your wallet.

This is also helpful for those of us that like to nurse our beers at sporting events. Now, instead of getting stuck with warm beer, you can just pour a few ounces here and there. You are the master of your domain!

Power is a wonderful thing.

So, my next question is when can we expect these at Philadelphia’s Citizens Bank Park?

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