Who’s on Crack in tech: 1.29.10

Welcome back to Gadgetell’s answer to Friday boredom. This week, we look at the moves in the tech world that are more than just awkward, sweaty, desperation. No, these moves could only be made by folks on narcotics. Let’s get to the addicted, er accused.

• iPad beta tester leak is a hoax
• More on that iPod touch camera story
• Hulu could be dead to me
• First ever Fanboi Award doled out

Jason Calacanis pulls hoax

If someone twitters in the forest, will it become fodder for the “prestige media”? If it is Jason Calacanis tweeting about his experience as a beta tester for the Apple Tablet, the answer is a resounding, “yup”. Calacanis “leaked” the iPad had solar panels, TiVo-like DVR, finger print reader, facial recognition, wireless charging and the kicker: Facebook’s Farmville for iPad a “huge game changer.”

We now know his info was bunk. Sites such as the Wall Street Journal, Wired, Joystiq, Macworld, Reuters all picked up the story, as they would any other quasi-credible sources talking about the biggest product launch of the month. Quasi-credible no more Mr. Calacanis.

Is Calacanis yucking it up now with his cronies? Is there a selfish smug satisfaction in duping puppies who believe a giant meaty bone is just around the next corner? Or does her really have iPad 2.0, the really expensive version for crack addicts? My money is on the latter.

2 events and still no freaking camera for iPod touch?

What gives Apple? I’ve got a few hundred dollars burning a freaking hole through my jeans I’d love to fork over for a new iPod touch. I’ve waited through two events, one a sure thing where iPod cases were supposed to spoil the surprise of a new video camera on the touch and still nothing.

Did you punk me? Did you, Apple, go out and leak specs that included a camera on the new iPod touch only to fake us out? Really? You would tool up a whole iPod case facility all in a cruel joke on me? Really?

Are you guys working with Calacanis?

Hulu thinking about capitalization

In our tit for tat exchange yesterday on the iPad, I was quick to grab ahold of Flash as an con for the device. The single reason for wanting Flash (for me anyway) is Hulu, the video streaming site that has so much of today’s current content. But, like any good thing, Hulu is thinking the end is near.

Our Greg Billetdeaux reports, “rumors are swirling around the web about Hulu’s possible two new business models. Both of them charging money for our shows.”

And with that, Flash is dead to me. I will take joy in the broken link images, the fast website downloading when I am on the go and missing out on all those fun Flash games that hold my attention for 30 seconds.

Gaecke wins fanboi award

Congratulations go out to Appletell writer Jack Gaecke who wins the inaugural Who’s on Crack Fanboi Award. You might recall I poked fun at him over his CES almost non-stop chatter about Monster and how great they are. Gaecke’s unfettered adoration for all things Monster continue to amaze us. But it wasn’t his prose that won him the award, oh no.

Though his words were plentiful while expressing his undying love for the Beats by Dr. Dre. “Amazing” “Beyond mind blowing” ” I’ve never felt headphones have changed the way I listen to music before these”. Impressive accolades, to be sure, and I know he means every word of them. But that wasn’t the clincher for Gaecke. It was this:

A picture is worth a thousand words. It is rare for a reviewer to have the courage to put an image of themselves in the review, but this image speaks volumes on the level Gaecke is in love with these headphones, almost, perhaps, to an unhealthy level. I am unsure if I should contact his finace, a doctor or maybe just a hotel that rents rooms by the hour.

Kudos for being brave enough to show the world your level of dysfunction, er love for a product.