Japanese children explain Mario’s family

This is one of those things that fall somewhere in between “Things that make you go ‘Awww’” and “Things that make you pee your pants laughing.” In his 4 Color Rebellion blog, Vinnk reveals a telling conversation with a class of six year old Japanese students he was teaching English to. He is a teacher stationed in Japan, and the lesson was supposed to be on teaching family words in English. He was going to use the Super Mario series to aid in the instruction. Instead the children revealed their twisted account of the Super Mario family tree.

Vinnk then transcribes the entire discussion, in English, that occurred. Apparently his students didn’t think he had the facts straight concerning how things went in the Mario world. For example some of the tidbits of wisdom include the fact that since Luigi is taller than Mario, he’s older. Wario is also apparently Mario’s brother, Peach is his sister and Bowser is apparently either the uncle or father of the whole clan.

Also interesting is that the kids couldn’t be prompted to say Super Mario Brothers. Instead they offered other Mario series titles, such as Mario Party or Super Mario Galaxy. I wish there was an example of American kids coming up with stuff like this.

At the end of Vinnk’s account, he sums things up and posts a list of the facts as seen by the Japanese six year olds. They are as follows:

1. Mini Koopa is Mario’s brother, stepbrother or cousin.
2. How height of someone is directly proportional to how old they are.
3. Mario’s father (or uncle) often kidnaps his own daughter (or niece).
4. It is up to Mario to constantly defeat his father (or uncle) to win the love of his sister.
5. Mario is possibly romantically involved with his sister.
6. Mario has an evil brother.
7. No one knows who Waluigi is, but he hangs out with the family at most parties.

Oh what a twisted web Nintendo has woven.

Read [4 Color Rebellion] Via [DS Fanboy]