Perhaps you’ve made a long road-trip with your friends. You’re piled in a car with people you generally like, but there’s that one guy who’s so annoying that his very voice makes you want to crash headlong into a concrete divider just to shut him up. Well, that guy is half the characters in Ignition Entertainment’s Arc Rise Fantasia. And that’s a shame, because they’re spoiling an otherwise memorable trip.

Boy, Valhalla Knights: Eldar Saga sure sounds impressive, doesn’t it? The title makes it sound like a game that shouldn’t just be played, but conquered. There should be figures and books and a movie. It just sounds epic. Sadly, it’s not. This is a game that sucks the joy out of gaming, and that’s too bad, because there probably is something great here burried under the layers of muck.